Sarge's Rant

Sarge's Epic Rant is a short video segment taken from Episode 2 of A Slap On Titan and which was released by Tomandre on 18 March 2014, shortly after the release of the second episode and which would be one of many shorts which would be released on the channel during the running of and after the end of season 1 whilst waiting for season 2 as well as during season 2 of A Slap On Titan.

The short is of Sarge (voiced by Casey May) ranting at the new recruits of the 104th Trainee Corps including Eren, Mikasa, Jean, Armin and many other main and side characters for several minutes laying on insult after insult about their lives in an effort to break them down so he could build them in his mould.

Transcript
Sarge: I put in an order to the empire to send me a shitload of badasses and pillage-hungry murder machines and instead all I got was you cupcake cock-clowns and a side order fuck nuggets. I can see at a glance that 50% of you are cock-suckers and the other 50% are cock-suckers who've never been told to believe in themselves. I'm gonna' shove my boot so far and fast up your assholes it will trigger a geological event. You all reek of poverty and animal abuse, every breath you take is a stunning endorsement of abortion. You shit-stains are a collective masterpiece of failure. You cock-gobble and circle jerk each other to exhaustion every night, you probably signed up just to get pounded by the titans and probably cried like sissies when you realized Titans don't actually have dicks. You're sensitive pussies cried so many tears you could float away on a river of douche canoes. You glitter-toed, cock-wrangling, fairy-tinkle bag puff of fuck nuggets are gonna' get you collective anal cavaties stretched so far apart you'll think you're getting double fisted by the colossal titan himself. I will reorganize the failure that is all your lives, I will fuck-start your soul! I'll make you Mongoloid rock-chompin thunder cunts scream harder than your mothers after her fourth failed coathanger aolrtion